Ferris Bueller sky drapes over the front lawn. Mallets clack against the balls as the Bandersnatch dog bounds through the ripe grass. The March Hare takes the lead while the Mad Hatter sulks in last. Flamingos swing, do-dos roll, and the sound of angry shouts slur the summer air. I step in thistles. Alice is lost somewhere in the middle. Messy rules and red roses dying, demand I quit. The rabbit, who is late for a very important date, manages to swing ahead. The Red Queen looks on, only teasing of cutting off heads. The metal wickets turn invisible in the grass. Is Wonderland this bad? The Caterpillar sits in silence. Frustration builds Snide remarks snitch the Snark Croquet is undone.